Friday, January 20, 2006

Dealing

Dear Megan,
I've often heard discussions about repressing memories and how they end up hurting you even more. Well here's the thing I've always been afraid of rejection, now I know you're gonna say that everyone is... no I'm truly horrified of rejection more so than most people. Why do you think I play so hard to get with good guys and end up dating the desperate. You see I've dated 14 people in my whole like and 8 have cheated on me, the moment I found out about it I'd break up with them and move on forgetting about how much I cared about them, i always thought that I was just stronger than most people my age. Contrary to popular belief I simply repressed the sadness of having a man who was supposed to be madlly in Love with me pick another woman over me to make out with or have sex with. I'm gonna dish on a couple of them that come back to my mind at random!

Josh Blankenship
he asked me to go steady with him and I said yes... Turned out my best friend in the entire world that I'd known since 1st grade Nikki Self was madly in Love with him... i just thought he was cute! Anyways as you know I do not kiss on the first date and it takes a lot of trusting for me to do ANYTHING with a guy. Well Nikki Josh and I went to a Christmas play at Josh's church on Nikki's birthday too... He was showing us around his church and we went to the second floor where there was supposed to be punch and cookies well he asked If I'd hold his coat cause he needed to talk to Nikki... I said that's fine and him and Nikki went into a different room to talk about something. Well they came back and Nikki wanted to go so we went outside to wait for her parents and we sat down and she looked at me and asked me "Emily, is there anything that if I did it you'd never be my friend ever again?" "Of course not Nikki you're my best friend!" she smiled at me and her parents showed up and we went home. about 30 minutes after getting home the phone rings, now my parents are pretty hard core about some things but they make exceptions for super good friends and Nikki had definantely been one, well it was Nikki and she sounded like she was crying... She told me how when Josh and her went to talk he turned out the lights and french kissed her as "Her birthday present" cause he knew how she felt about her! Next morning at school, Monday, I hunted that bastard down and we went into a practice room(we were all in band together) so if I felt like beating the shit out of him I could do it and no one would hear. I scared the crap out of him and broke up... he spent the next 3 days trying to apologizeand begged for me to take him back, I sat down with Nikki and they had reconciled and she told me not to give up on him he was a good guy... well I foolishly took him back on Thursday. That weekend was UIL competition so I got on the bus and went, I rocked the pants off those people and got a 1 as an 8th grader! Anyways I got home called josh celebrated over the phone and life went on fine! 2 weeks later another one of my friends came to me crying before school started and confessed to me that her and Josh had made out and she well gave him... something I never would! That was the end of Josh!!!

Jake
I had a different friends named Niki Johnson and she was dating Austin who was well the love of my life! well Jake and I started hanging out during a trip to San Antonio for band... I told him how I had had a crush on him since 8th grade(which wasn't true, Niki told me it would make him like me more) and he couldn't believe it because we'd never talked before and he had noticed me (who couldn't I'm so damn Loud) but didn't think I'd seen him! well we made out several times and hung out a lot and even discussed going all the way. We had so many friends in common so it was easy to get to see each other. well This one friday I came over to hang out and well I gave him something I never would have given Josh... Saturday and Sunday i paged him a million times... he'd never not returned my pages, Monday he broke up with me... one week later A "Concerned" friend (that means one of Jakes friends) informed me he had cheated on me. I confronted him and he told me the truth, him and Niki had had sex... ALL LEVELS OF PISSED OFF not only did he cheat on me, BUT Niki a friend of MINE had cheated on AUSTIN!!! I had introduced them too!! That miserable BITCH! She lied her ass off too. it wasn't till 2 years later she told me the truth...


So I'm having trouble writing these so I'll tella bout more later when i have the guts to get back into it!

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

What the hell.... I hate this Shit

Don't EVER leave the one you love for the one you like because the one you like will leave you for the one they love...tonight your true love will realize how much they love you. Between 1 & 4 in the afternoon, tomorrow the shock of your life will occur. if you break the chain then you will have bad luck...:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.If you REALLY LIKE (or LOVE) SOMEONE right now AND MISS THEM and can't get them out of your head then re-post this within 1 mintute and whoever you are missing will surprise you tomorrow

Saturday, November 19, 2005

You know you are from TEXAS if........
~You can properly pronounce Corsicana, Palestine, Decatur, WichitaFalls, San Antonio, Mexia, Waco, and Amarillo.
~A tornado warning siren is your signal to go out in the yard and look for a funnel.
~You've ever had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.
~You know that the true value of a parking space is not determined by the distance to the door, but by the availability of shade.
~You think everyone from a bigger city has an accent.
~You measure distance in minutes.
~Little Smokies are something you serve only for special occasions.
~You listen to the weather forecast before picking out an outfit.
~You know cowpies are not made of beef.
~Someone you know has used a football schedule to plan their wedding date.
~You have known someone who has had one belt buckle bigger than your fist.
~You aren't surprised to find movie rental, ammunition, and bait all in the same store.
~A Mercedes Benz is not a status symbol. A Ford F-250 Turbo Diesel 4x4 is.
~You know everything goes better with Ranch.~You actually get these jokes and are "fixin' " to send them to your friends.
~You go to the river/lake because you think it is like going to theocean.
~Finally, you are 100% Texan if you have ever heard this conversation:
"You wanna coke?"
"Yeah."
"What kind?"
"Dr. Pepper."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
If you are from Texas sign this and pass it on to share with other Texans!!
Lets see how many people we can get from the Lone Star State!!!
1. Erin K. - New Braunfels TX2. Tasena H.- Leander TX3. Melo - Katy, TX4. Charlie - Washington BIRTHPLACE OF Tx5. Jeremy - Brenham, TX6. Sarah- Spring and Washington, TX7. Hailey-Brenham, TX8.Lisa-Temple tx9. Andrew-- copperas cove tx10. Nikki-Corpus Christi/Killeen Tx11. Jasen - Dallas, Tx.12. Joseph - FT. Worth, TX.13. Daniel - Killeen, TX14. Stephen- Nacogdoches, TX.15. Sarah-Nacogdoches, TX16. Joel V. - Nacogdoches,TX17. heather mills parker-dallas, tx18. Kim-Lufkin, TX 19. Dillon T. - Diboll/Lufkin, TX20. Jaimee- Center, TX21.hunter-huntsville,tx22. Courtney - Missouri City, TX23. Mark - Missouri City, TX24. Jessica - Missouri City, TX25. Brittni- Missouri City, TX!26. Stephanie-Abilene, TX27. Keke-LeNe tOwn, TX28. Jonathan-Lil' Jon- Lene town, TX29. Kristina- Abilene, TX(right now germany cuz military)30. Chris-ABILENE, TX --- Hell yea baby!!31. Manases AKA NOS - LENE TOWN, TX AKA ABILENE BUT CURRENTLY CEDAR HILL/DALLAS TX32. Alan Dallas, TX Lived here all my life, 27 years. (Even turned down a high paying job to stay in Texas, NOW THATS DEVOTION). 33. Lance - New Braunfels/Dallas34. Vanessa - bedford, TX35. Timothy - Albany/Fort Worth, TX36. Amanda - Garland/ currently Lewisville, tx37. Morgan- Mesquite, Dallas, Garland, Plano, Allen, Richardson... pretty much every suburb of dallas.... lol38. Preston - Mesquite, Allen and fuck do I miss them39. Natasha-Dallas, Granbury, Sanger, Denton, Arlington, Lewisville, Coppell....so pretty much everywhere in the Dallas/Ft. Worth area.... 40. Jeramie... DALLAS...41. Stephanie~~Fort Worth 42. Emily - Crowley,Tx

Sunday, November 13, 2005

TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name:Emily
Birthday:March 7th
Birthplace:Fort Worth,TX
Current Location:Millspring,NC
Eye Color:Blue
Hair Color:Brown
Height:5'5"
Right Handed or Left Handed:Right handed
Your Heritage:German
The Shoes You Wore Today:Flip Flops
Your Weakness:Chocolate
Your Fears:Suffocation
Your Perfect Pizza:Canadian Bacon and Pineapple
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year:Figure out where to go next year
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger:Wench, Please!
Thoughts First Waking Up:Oh God turn the noise off!
Your Best Physical Feature:My flat smile
Your Bedtime:when I pass out
Your Most Missed Memory:Clubbin with Megan in Little Rock
Pepsi or Coke:pepsi
MacDonalds or Burger King:McDonalds
Single or Group Dates:don't care
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea:Lipton
Chocolate or Vanilla:Chocolate
Cappuccino or Coffee:Coffee
Do you Smoke:I have before
Do you Swear:all the time
Do you Sing:in the Shower
Do you Shower Daily:hECK yEAH
Have you Been in Love:yes
Do you want to go to College:already been
Do you want to get Married:one day not today
Do you belive in yourself:of course
Do you get Motion Sickness:nope
Do you think you are Attractive:HECK YEAH
Are you a Health Freak:Not all the time
Do you get along with your Parents:yeah pretty well
Do you like Thunderstorms:OH My Gosh YES
Do you play an Instrument:Flute
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol:Oh Yeah
In the past month have you Smoked:maybe
In the past month have you been on Drugs:no
In the past month have you gone on a Date:yes
In the past month have you gone to a Mall:yes
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos:not on my own
In the past month have you eaten Sushi:Heck Yeah
In the past month have you been on Stage:well not with an audience but I did visit Erostas' Set
In the past month have you been Dumped:no
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping:no
In the past month have you Stolen Anything:no
Ever been Drunk:Yes
Ever been called a Tease:Yes
Ever been Beaten up:no
Ever Shoplifted:no
How do you want to Die:in my sleep
What do you want to be when you Grow Up:A House Wife
What country would you most like to Visit:China
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color:Brown
Favourite Hair Color:Brunette
Short or Long Hair:Short
Height:6'
Weight:don't care
Best Clothing Style:Comfortable
Number of Drugs I have taken:As long as you don't do it anymore I don't care
Number of CDs I own:I don't Care
Number of Piercings:I don't Care
Number of Tattoos:Ooh I do like Tattoos
Number of things in my Past I Regret:2

CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!

Friday, November 11, 2005

Family

There are complete strangers I consider closer to me than certain people that share the same gene pool as myself!

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

My latest boredom

Emily, your emotions are triggered by your underlying belief in Honesty

In other words, your commitment to leading an honest life, and your belief in the truth, directly affect how, and how often, you experience certain feelings.For example, your test results indicate that you're most fulfilled when you can share all your thoughts and feelings — good or bad. That factor is directly related to your fundamental belief in honesty and the range of emotions it triggers. Based on your belief in honesty, where do you rank in the emotional landscape? Which of your emotions dominate your life? And how can you learn to control your emotions?

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Interratial Relationship Statistics

DATING EXPERIENCES AND ATTITUDES (based on 496 teens who have dated)
Have dated someone of another race
All: 57% Whites: 47% Blacks: 28% Hispanics: 90%
Have not, but would consider it
All: 30% Whites: 36% Blacks: 28% Hispanics: 9%
Would not consider it
All: 13% Whites: 17% Blacks: 12% Hispanics: 1%
Percent of whites who have dated a Black: 17% Hispanic: 33% Asian: 15%
Percent of blacks who have dated a White: 44% Hispanic: 38% Asian: 10%
Percent of Hispanics who have dated a White: 82% Black: 40% Asian: 25%
HOW PARENTS REACT
How parents say they would (or did) react if (or when) their teen dated interracially:
Totally fine with it: 62% Would/did mind: 34% Depends: 4%
How teens say their parents would (or did) react if (or when) they dated interracially:
Totally fine with it: 64% Would/did mind: 34% No opinion: 2%
Percent of adults who agree with statement:
'It's all right for blacks and whites to date each other.'
1987: 48% Now: 69%
HOW TEENS REACT
Types of interracial dating most likely to cause problems with other teens of the same race/ethnicity as the person dating, based on the percentage of teens who say it would cause problems:
White dating a black: 24%
Black dating a white: 23%
Black dating an Asian: 21%
Asian dating a black: 19%
Black dating a Hispanic: 12%
Hispanic dating an Asian: 11%
Hispanic dating a black: 11%
White dating an Asian: 11%
Asian dating a Hispanic: 10%
White dating a Hispanic: 10%
Hispanic dating a white: 10%
Asian dating a white: 8%
WHY TEENS DATE
Percent of teens who give these reasons for interracial dating:
Find the person attractive: 97%
Care about the person: 91%
Are open-minded: 89%
Are curious: 75%
Trying to be different: 54%
Rebelling against parents: 47%
Trying to be cool: 46%
Trying to get attention of parents: 43%


Enough Statistics
"Like all children, multiracial and multiethnic children need heroes with whom they can identify. They need to know that multiracial and multiethnic people can be successful. James Audubon (ornithologist), Tiger Woods (golfer), Maria Tallchief (ballet dancer), and Betty Okino (Olympic gymnasts) are just a few examples of these heroes (http://www.ed.gov/). "
"All children have special needs and situations with which they deal with on a daily basis. However, multiracial children not only have to deal with the normal difficulties of childhood and family situations, they have to also deal with an identity situation (Harsha). Multiracial Children have identity issues and concerns of experiencing a sense of being different (physical appearance, name, language, etc), experiencing not fully belonging to any ethnic group, experiencing difficulty with incorporating different heritages into one identity, and experiencing racism from all ethnic groups, including their own. Children of mixed racial and ethnic heritage need an enhanced sense of self and identity and greater intergroup tolerance, language facility, and an appreciation of minority group cultures. The sense of self and identity develops over the entire span of childhood, therefore schooling has an important role in multiracial children’s lives. "

References
1. Harsha, Kacy L., “Implications for Teachers of Multiracial Children.”
2. Poston, C. W. (1990). The multiracial identity development model: A needed addition.
3. Wardle, Francis, “Helping Multiracial and Multiethnic Children Escape No Man’s Land”
4. Wardle, Francis (1999), “Children of Mixed Race—No Longer Invisible”
5. Penn State College of Agricultural Sciences. Diverse Issues “Diversity in People: What Are You? No simple answer for bi-racial people.”
6. http://www.ed.gov/

Sunday, October 02, 2005

Ode to Texas

I apologize to Josh for not including Josh in the Ode to Texas Blog
Josh I love you!

Sunday, September 25, 2005

uh who are you

Someone totally left a comment but no idea who you are! Let me know and I'll apologize profusely

Sunday, September 18, 2005

Ode to Texas

Come Back to Texas
It's just not the same since you went away before you miss your exit
and drive right on through the lone star state
Troy Aikman wants you back
Willie Nelson wants you back
NASA wants you back
and the Bush Twins wants you back
Pantera wants you back
And BLUE BELL wants you back
I've got a preminition of taking a petition that the whole States Gonna SIGN

Ok these words are in a song but they have held great value to me these last few days, I miss My Grandparents Kraus Carrie Megan and Jessie(honorary Texan)

Wednesday, May 25, 2005

A seriouse come back

Do to a single request by the best friend I've ever had I've decided to update!
I become a Certified Nurses Assisstant On Tuesday and plan to work in the Trauma Center in Asheville. I also plan to go on to get my RN in 2 years.

In 3 months I'm going to buy myself a Mini Cooper, that's after I send money I owe to certain Harding people who have waited for a long time for it!

"I am Jacks complete lack of Surprise!"

The most interesting part of my job is the special units I get to work in. Of all of them I liked surgery the most. I've considered becoming and anisthesia Tech but that's so seperated from the patients experience. But who relaly knows. All we can do is set goals and strive to reach them all the rest fills in the gaps.

My parents are still building their house, and those of you who have spoken to me recently know that I'm still in a 40 foot RV with BOTH of my parents and I sware I could kill them in their sleep! But then again some people live in like 1,100 square foot houses and still can't handle their parents! So I'm doing Awesome... heheheheh!

other news is I've joined netflix, still e-mailing sean, Lost a cat about a month ago (she got killed by a lawn mower), had another cat (Libby) disapear and then showed back up 3 days later completely bruised and tired, she layed around for the next week and finally revived herself and hasn't strayed far since, my dad got a big time manager job like his old one in texas, I quit my job a wal-mart (obviousely), I've kind of made friends out here, and can't wait till Jessie heads my way!

That about wraps it out ladies and gentlemen if you've got questions feel free to ask I'll get back to you as soon as I can!

Thursday, January 27, 2005

I'm sorry Ladies

I know I was supposed to call peoples back but I ended up getting a job and have been working hard! I am sorry I did not call you back but I'm so Frickin tired that i go to sleep at 9:30 or 10 so between 9-9:30 I always seem to forget to call until I'm falling asleep! Talk at you beautiful people later, Oh and those who left anonymous notes you should really leave your name or else I have no clue who's talkin at me! Good luck in ya'lls classes!

Sunday, January 23, 2005

I'M STILL ALIVE!!!!! I promise!

Sorry Christopher this will have no substanence for you.
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And I Love You too Jessie!
I miss you all! Kraus, Robin, Josh, and Aaron I'll check at ya later!

Tuesday, December 21, 2004

I don't know...

Hey ya'll it's Megan. I don't know how many of you read this, but I wanted to let you know some stuff. I'm the luckiest person in the world, because I nearly lost my best friend in the world, but was lucky enough to not. Emily came down with pneumonia (lol didn't think I could spell it did ya?) and it was so bad that she was in critical condition for a few days and in the Searcy Hospital for nearly a week. However she is out and better now. Turns out she's more like me than we thought... she's got high anxiety... wouldn't ya know it's contagious... anywho. I am so glad that I didn't have to call each of you and explain that Emily was no longer with us. Pray for her. I need her to stay alive a REALLY long time... she's one of the few that keeps me sane. Dangit I promised myslef I wouldn't cry... I love you Emily!!

Wednesday, December 08, 2004

http://tooeasytowalkaway.blogspot.com/

Monday, December 06, 2004

God Only Knows What I'd Be Without You

Megan Johnson
Carrie Schwiger
Jessie Floyd
Sean Williams
Ryan Kraus
Josh lawrence
and his Ashley
Aaron Rushton
Blake Beamon
Leslie Blancas
Regina Wong
Amy Allen
Mom
Dad
Mammoo
Pawpaw
Uncle Mimi
Aunt Cheryl
Christopher Word
Uncle Mike
Aunt Suzanne
Nick Crow
Christie Crow
Robin Crocker
TJ Micheal
Laura Fossi
Josh Potter
Susie Loveland

Friday, December 03, 2004

For Meg-head

So we played truth or dare and something stuck out.
I guess I'm starting to feel more insecure about myself, but I had asked Robin what his impression of me(in many more words) and he shared his room mates opinion
'You are a warm life affirming person!" course there was more but that's what sticks out ya know?! It was good to hear a compliment like that. You know one with depth and severe sincerity! Pure innocent honesty! He has truly given me reason to being me again. Something only Megan had been capable of! And he doesn't even know it.
I miss you Meg-Head! But I hope this entry makes it way to your heart as it has mine!

Wednesday, December 01, 2004

Quote

"You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest player in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the American Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war and the three most powerful man in American are named Bush, Dick and Colon. Need I say more?" - Chris Rock

Monday, November 29, 2004

I love you

Just thought I'd leave you a little present... Kisses!! Empress Megan... Peace out Princess!!

Saturday, November 27, 2004

I have photographic memory. I just don't have any film...

I Love Jesus I don't need anything between him and me! He is all around you not in a building! Look under a rock and you will find him; split a piece of wood and he is there!

Countless Hours

How many moments do you spend on the most important things to you?
I have now spent an entire week rekindling the support that a friend once considered unbreakable!
Megan is well, and so Am I!
I think now would be the moment to say "speak or forever hold your peace"
Now is the time to tell me anything you may have done to hurt me intentionally or not, anything you may have lied about, anything I may have done and it pissed you off. Tell me now, for right now in the next few days before Christmas break are the chances I'm going to give you. Yes You whoever you are that is reading my blog!
Don't tell me online or through someone else.
Tell me to my face or if nothing else then through a hand written note, At least then it'll be incredably personal!
I am sorry if I have hurt you, please let me know if there's anything I can do for you no matter what it is.
Whether you want to smuggle a fish into the dorm to giving you my shoes cause your poor and you have no other foot wear!
I Love You all and will see you all very very soon!
I have to give a shout out to Kraus because you just might be my last straight male friend!
Carrie, I'm so crashing at your place! You better get back before Sunday night!
Jessie, Oh you know you need me. I will call when i get back in!
Josh, Go get her Tiger then call me I'll be with Carrie and Jessie!
In the Famous Words of Megan
"Piece Out Princess"